Update, Valentines Day!!!!

Yesterday after my post I went and was reading some of my favorite blogs and well I got slapped in the face hard like black eye slap. Have you ever read a story on the news, heard a song on the radio, or read a blog post and thought wow this is about me??? Well if you havent maybe then maybe Im just a crazy person hahahaha. The blog post I read yesterday was about excuses and how people are always making them. I am so guilty of being the dreadful excuse lady. I always come up with an excuse for everything. My family hurts my feelings what do I??? I make up an excuse for them doing it. I have loads of laundry to wash I make up a good excuse on why I shouldnt do them tonight. I could go on and on with all the excuses I make for EVERYTHING. Why???? I have no clue cause Im only hurting myself. I dont want to be known as the excuse maker. I have got to learn to just do. As you can tell in alot of my previous post Im having a hard time with alot. I guess my blog is my way to get everything off my chest and just feel better. I am one of these thats lets people throw stones at me and never once do anything about it. I do not know how to brush it off though I hold it in I analyze and usually think it was ok for what the person did like I deserved it. So please think about me during this time cause my lil devil is giving my angel on my right shoulder a whipping and I have to find a way for the devil to lose.

Ok back to what I been saying I wanted to share with yall. I never dated much in high school so I never experienced alot. I never even celebrated valentines day with a boy til my ex hubby ( I feel so embarrassed saying that) Anyway. Jeremy is the 2nd boy to spend Valentines day with and he hands down did the best he but so much thought and love into it. I def am excited about this valentines day. We told each other not to spend alot of money cause we just actually wanted to spend some time alone together which we rarely get. It was a great night spent with the one I love so dearly so hope you enjoy the pictures.

Jeremy grilled steaks for supper and we had baked potato with it. We curled up on the couch and watched tv together. He also gave me his letterman jacket from high school. I never had a guy give me his letterman jacket so I thought it was so sweet cause he knew that nobody had ever done that. Sorry for the awful pictures of me I had zero makeup on and ouch. Oh well you get to see the good the bad and the ugly hahahaha.

I am so ready for this weekend me and Jeremy need a fun weekend together so hopefully we will get one. I also hope everyone that reads this has a great weekend to.

Better late than never!!!!

So sorry that I didnt blog yesterday it was just one of those days where pms got the best of me and I didnt want to talk or blog to anyone. Im sure everybody has experienced this. Sometimes I am my own worst enemy and I am full aware of this sometimes I do things that hurt me and I have no clue why I do it. Yesterday my emotions were scattered and a hot mess. I felt bloated, useless, and just damn right down in the dumps. Knowing I already felt like this I got on facebook and looked at Jeremy's ex girlfriends page. WTH was I thinking well evidently I am a dumb @$$. She is super skinny long pretty hair and just a pretty girl. YEp the next is horrible on my part but the self pity began. I cried and was thinking why is Jeremy with me when he can have this girl ( she broke up with him but has tried to get him back after we started dating) and I started thinking about everything that I have put him through. Well onWEdnesday nights Jeremy comes down to see me and well we fought all night just about it. After he gets there my mom calls saying I messed her vehicle up when I had used it and that just added to my fire. I took all my hurt in my heart out on Jeremy I know I shouldnt have done that but trust me at the time I felt like it was right.

Since I decided to make changes in my life i feel like I am an emotional wreck. I want a family that I can depend on and a family that is caring and not full of drama. I want a family that cares about me and doesnt just call me when they want something or when its convenient. I want a family like Jeremy has who is always there for each other loving supportive and not trying to tear the other one down. I dont want to be like anybody in my family and I feel like the harder I am tryingto become my own person and break away the harder that lil devil is on me. Jeremy is wanting me to move in with him he is closing on a house this Friday and I am scared to death. I want this but at the same time Im scared about leaving what I know here. Im use to the craziness and drama my family puts me through. What if I dont like the other??? I feel in the middle and I dont know what to do. I feel like im notsatisfied with anything in my life at the moment and I hate that cause I am a happy person. I know I love jeremy that is not a question in my mind but I am scared of failing again. I have done been through one divorce and I guess it just scares me what if I go through another one and have to pick myself up again.

I hate that everytime you have to open up my blog it is about my emotional roller coaster but that is why i need this blog I need support team that have been through this and that can say to me this to shall pass. I have been through alot and overcome alot but here lately I just want to give up. You remember watching cartoons growing up and thhere would be a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other. Well there you go my angel and devil are fighting and well somethinghasgot to give the devil slips and falls but then somehow that joker always climbs back up stronger than ever. I have to find away to knock that devil off and keep him away so I can enjoy life.

On a happy note this morning I grabbed this red dress out of my closet that I use to love but my belly bulge was to big and it made the dress so uncomfortable. Well guess what I am wearing it this morning and it fits perfect!!!!!! Tomorrow I will show yall pictures from me and Jeremy's first Valentines together thats for being so patient.

Painting Fun

Good Morning??? Well I am trying to stay positive I woke up this morning to a wonderful thunderstorm which means its a gloomy messy day. I so wish I could be at home in the bed with my pup watching movies all day long. Stupid work :( I was telling yall yesterday about my pianting fun I had with my mom and sister Friday night but sadly i have no photos. This was not the first time I went to a painting class a few months ago well about 3 months ago I went with Jeremy's sister to one. We painting an owl which was suppa cute so since I am having computer problems and apparently phone problems. Ok lets me honest here evidently Im just dumb and me and technology do not get along. Anyway here are some pictures from that night.



Shand and I ready for some painting fun:)





Jeremy and I

He was going out with a friend but we had to have a photo session to:)











This is what the painting is suppose to look like hahahahaha

What my canvas looked like before:)

hahahahaha giving you step by step

We decided to take a break hahahaha

.

and tahdah!!!!! My owl isnt he precious hehehehe
More like an owl on crack hahahahaha
Oh well I like him



This night was so much fun just getting to have some one on one time with Shanda and to have some girl time. I dont trust girls cause come on you know we are well witches but switch the letter w with a b. So it was fun to have a lil girl time. I havent hung my painting up anywhere but I think one day if I have a lil girl I want to hang it up in her nusery. I know prob cheesy but I like cheesy:)

Tomorrow I am going to post pictures from me and Jeremy's first valentines together!! No it will not be mushy but cheesy yes cause that is def what kind of couple we are:) 

Weekend Recap and My Monday!!!!

I am so frustrated. I have the cutest pictures  on my phone to upload and been trying to all morning and UGH I cant do it. So I sent the mms from my phone like it said got the code number and all and when I enter it in it keeps giving me an error????? So anyway I guess yall want be seeing my wonderful pictures from the weekend.

Friday was work and work then after work I meet my mom and sister and we went to a painting class called Easeley Amused. So much fun we painting a scarecrow which mine didnt look anything like what it was suppose to but it was still fun.

Saturday i got up early so I could run too the grocery store to get all my ingredients to do some cooking for the tailgate. I fixed peanut butter cup cookies which I have a picture on my phone and yummm so good. Jeremy helped me out in the kitchen by cooking cream cheese sausage balls which were a big hit to. After cooking we got dressed and headed out to drop Lizzie Mae off at my moms house. We had so much fun at the ballgame with great friends and YAY State won!!!!!! I have a fun story to tell yall tomorrow wish I had time now but since I spent all day trying to figure out how to upload pictures I am behind on my work.

Sunday we slept in late got up went and got Lizzie and came home and ate a bite of lunch. We made a run to walmart then came home and I washed my car and cleaned it out, read some in my book then took a nap. Yesterday was basically a relaxing day but was productive at the same time if that makes any sense.

Today well as you already know im frustrated cause i want my readers to be able to see pictures to go along with my story and Im not having any luck :( but I will not give up

Sure hope yall had a great weekend and are off to a good Monday!!!!!

Best week eva!!!!!!!!!

Ok this has been the best week nothing to complain about (knocking on wood) I can not remember the last time I had this good of a week. Life feels great I love waking up in the mornings the days are going smooth and my ride to work in the morning are smooth. WHOOP WHOOP!!!!

So recap of where I left off if you didnt read my post Tuesday that is fine I will share again I got a new ride. Awe it might not be a brand new car but trust me if you had been driving my old junk then you would be excited to. I am in love. So tuesday I signed my life away and now I am in debt hahahahaha!!!! I was so happy then Wednesday morning I was on my way to work and my service engine soon light came on I was like OMG nooooooooooooooo I thought I havent even owned this car for 24 hours and I have done messed it up. And half the time it was in the driveway just parked. I felt like I was going to die. Well I took it back to the dealer and guess what was wrong???? This girl didnt have the gas cap on tight enough. I didnt even know cars would tell you that stuff. My old car never told me nothing til I was broke down on the side of the road.

Tuesday night I watched Dancing with the Stars and Body of Proof. I had never watched Body of Proof before but I really enjoyed it and def think I will watch it again. Last night was a jammed pack night of tv watching. I need DVR yes I admit I do not have DVR what in the hell is wrong with me. Anyway I watched Survivor, the Xfactor, and Revenge. I am not a big survivor fan but I watch it for the boyfriend shhhhhhh dont tell him now. The x-factor I wasnt as excited as I am when American Idol comes on but I did like the show. Revenge whew I had a hard time keeping up I can tell it is one of those you cant miss a second of it and with a drama queen pupper who just got fixed OMG I never can sit down. I really did like it though and lizzie mae might have to go spend the night with her nanna on Wednesday nights hahahah

Today I have another busy day, I have alot of work to do at work plus going to get my eye brows done good lord they are out of control. Tonight I am taking my nephew to a football game so we can have some bonding time. I love that lil guy so much!!!!!! I hope you all are having a good week and that it is going smoothly for you. Mine is great even though I have been no makeup week YIKES scary the clients away.

A Grrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttt Post!!!!

I am having a great week at this moment I do not think that anything not even this gloomy rainy weather can take my smile away. Why you ask??? This lil girl is growing up and purchased my first ride well I am signing the papers on them today. YES!!!!!!! It is nothing to really brag about to a bunch of people cause it is just a 2006 model but after all I have dealt with and been through the last few years this girl is so proud of this accomplishment. I was gonna upload a picture from my phone but guess what blogger what upload it. I have a iphone 3 and everytime I send a text with the photo I get a message failed message??? Any suggestions on what I should do to fix this problems.

So recap of yesterday well it all started with my motivational preaching I got from Kelly which double thank you for that wonderful blog sermon cause yesterday know will def be a day I will never forget and you were apart of it. I just worked, got a car, and went home. I was hoping for a workout date with Julian Michaels but when I got home Lizzie was wanted some mommy time so sorry Julian but my pupper comes first to me. Maybe today though ;) I just enjoyed a night with Lizzie in my lap ( cause this never happens) and watched tv. I watched Dancing with the stars, Two and a half men, and Castle. Dancing with the stars I thought the cast was really good and I have no clue who will go home tonight I mean nobody just  down right stunk to me. I loved the new Two and a half men but then I read some horrible reviews this morning and I was like well Nicole evidently it doesnt take much for you to laugh. Castle I really think I am going to like I watched the season finale last year and was wanting more so hope I continue to feel like this even though I am lost in some ways.

I made a goal to get up earlier this morning I usually get up at 7:10 let Lizzie outside then I literally run to take a shower, dry my hair, put clothes on, and out the door and at work by 8. Ugh Nicole why do you do this to yourself. I get to work and feel so drained from how fast I get ready. So I decided to quit with the excuses that I was gonna take baby steps though so I set my alarm for 6:45 well ugh I didnt totally fail this morning but I was still rushed getting ready. I woke up and just laid in the bed til 6:45 I checked facebook and read emails which I have never done in the mornings but that is not why I set my alarm earlier. BUT like I said I am not going to overload myself baby steps Nicole. I will not beat myself up though I will stay motivated and meet my goals.

One goal is to spice up my blog page its so BORING it has no life really. So anyone who wants to spice it up for me and help me let me know. hahahahaha

Weekend Recap, Brand New Week, Update on Lizzie

Whew I have to say I am really getting into this blog cause I could not wait for Monday morning so I could finally sit down and tell you about my last couple of days. Backing way up to last Thursday, I had to take Lizzie to the vet to get fixed which this mama cried then I went to Dirt Cheap shopping and got some good deals YAY!!!! Around dinner me and Jeremy headed to Starkville to do some shopping before the big game. We also went to Mugshots and meet up with some friends. Even though the bulldogs lost to the LSU tigers I still had a great day with my boyfriend and our friends. Friday- I got up and worked to dinner then had to go pick up Lizzie which she was so pissed at me :( but once she got home she was ok. Friday night we just laid around with Lizzie and watched tv. Saturday morning got up and was dragging :( but I still went to the park and was going to run but ugh I just didnt have the motivation in me to do it. I did walk and jogged a lil but was so disappointed in myself. I went home and just laid around with Lizzie the rest of the day. Sunday morning was the same thing to except I didnt run at all I kept telling myself I had to much to do which is totally a lie.

I read my favorite blog this morning Fitting Back In. Have you ever went to church and felt like the preacher was talking directly to you??? Well Kelly makes me feel like that alot. I say she she is my new friend cause even though we dont talk alot I feel like she "preaches" to me alot. I have so much I want to do for myself but I am constantly saying I will do it tomorrow or doing stuff for others and getting stressed out. I have got to quit making excuses for myself and why I am not getting stuff done. I always say started tomorrow then when tomorrow comes its ok Nicole starting tomorrow. UGH I have got to quit I have 15 projects I want to do. I want to make a recipe book, I want to be more organized, I want to become a runner, I want to wake up earlier ever day and not feel so rushed, I want to cook more, and I want to read more. I have not done none of this. It so frustrates me cause thats why I started a blog so I would change my bad habits and I have made some changes and I am so proud of myself. I am so thankful to have found the blog world and blogs like Kelly who motivates me to not give up and keep pushing. I knew this wasnt going to be easy when I started it but I will not and cant quit. Starting right now Im going to use every secong of the day on stuff for me and do the things I want to do. Quit all this putting it off til tomorrow. Like Kelly said in her blog today even the president has time to work out everyday. Thanks Kelly for once again motivating me to get up off my lazy but and do something. I got to quit moaning and groaning and just do it.

Oh before I go I need to give you an dupdate on Lizzie. I tried to upload a picture from my iphone but blogger want let me???? I dont know eek!!!! Lizzie is a DRAMA queen!!!!!!!!!!! She doesnt take pain very well ( just like her momma) and she is milking this for all that she can. I even hand feed her the other night. I think she honestly feels better but just doesnt want me to know that. I bet right now she is throwing a party in her pen!!!!

What are some things in your life you want to change??? Like I already said I want to cook more and be more organized. I want to be more accountable for my eating and exercise to.

What is something that helps you get motivated??? Well Kelly from fitting back in at the moment I think im gonna read her blog post over and over again today heheheh!!!! Music also helps get me pumped up and I feel fearless.